Mommy Wants Mayonnaise: September 16, 2022
Dear Mommy Wants Mayonnaise,
I’m an entrepreneur and a mom and have recently come back from maternity leave. I can admit to myself that I’m still finding my balance of work and home life as this is my first baby and although I’m excited to get back into projects, I don’t feel like my mind has completely recovered from the sleep deprived nights. So when my entrepreneur colleague asked to have lunch, I thought it would be a nice way to ease back into the things. Unfortunately, that was the day my baby girl decided she needed my full attention, fussing and crying and carrying on in the restaurant as my colleague tried to ask me about mutual plans for the next year and next five years in our work together. I felt very indecisive and distracted, apologizing to her throughout. But now I can’t shake the feeling that she’s lost some faith in my abilities due to my scattered presentation at lunch. How do I regain her confidence in me?
-Overwhelmed Entrepreneur
Hi Overwhelmed,
As a fellow entrepreneur and mom, I understand how hard it can be to juggle projects and roles. What makes you think she’s lost faith in your abilities? Has she treated you differently since lunch? I suspect you are being overly hard on yourself and encourage you to go through the following thought-stopping exercise. Ask yourself, what’s the evidence that her losing faith in you is true? What is the evidence that it’s false? Sometimes our emotions drive our worries whereas this exercise is all about accessing logic instead. If you feel like there is some evidence of her lost faith in your abilities, how would you like to address it with her? Do you want to set a goal that feels tangible the next 90 days that would prove to yourself and to her that you are getting your momentum back? Is there another way to measure progress as an entrepreneur and a mom? Whatever goals you set for yourself, it’s worthwhile to revisit SMART goals. Goals that are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely. This structure will help you evaluate your own progress which can impact your confidence in yourself and how you show up to others, including your entrepreneurial colleague and collaborator.
Dear Mommy Wants Mayonnaise,
My spouse and I moved to a new town for his job and I’m feeling pretty isolated as a new mom. How do I find other moms to connect with?
-Introverted Mama
Hi Introverted,
What kinds of things do you enjoy both before becoming a mom and now as a new mom? Have you explored any online groups as a convenient way to get to know other moms and possibly learn about events? As an introvert, would you rather set up a playdate with just one to two other moms rather than attend a larger event? The possibilities are endless! Start by searching for online mom groups in your area on Facebook. Check out the local community center and library and grab their calendars of events. Visit your local parks and be open to saying hi to other moms on the playground. By picking activities you enjoy, you’ll show up more relaxed and open to connecting with others, making it that much easier to make new friends in your new town!
Follow Khara @kharacroswaite.medium.com
Khara is a Licensed Mental Health/Financial Therapist and mom in Denver, Colorado. This column is meant for educational purposes only and does not represent advice or replace a trained professional. Any resemblance to actual persons, places, or events is purely coincidental. If you are struggling with your mental health, please dial 988 to talk with a trained professional.
